Three things that make me nervous about the 2009 GIS

Don't worry, I'm not about to get serious on you.

The GIS always comes along with some... interesting assignments... for me. For example, at any of the last few shows you could have seen me competing in a bubble-blowing contest, or competing at a Wii golf tournament, or chasing Greg Norman or Johnny Miller around the show floor.

It's that not-your-everyday-in-the-office type stuff that makes me nervous about the GIS. Don't get me wrong, I also enjoy it. But there's that tiny thought in the back of my mind that makes me wonder if I'll somehow be a horrible embarrassment to GCMand GCSAA... like when I showed the world I can barely blow a bubble with bubble gum, for instance. (Pictured left, Greg Lyman shows the world that he is indeed full of hot air, and can blow a bubble with the best of 'em.)

Having my 2009 GIS schedule in hand, here are my top three could-be-disastrous moments for this year's GIS:

1. Habitat for Humanity volunteer project (Tuesday, Feb. 4th). Again, don't get me wrong, I'm excited to take part in a project where I'll be helping my fellow Americans and rebuilding one of this nation's great cities (wow, I sounded noble just now). But the truth is, I'm not a very handy guy. I don't work on cars. Home improvement never turns out right for me. I can barely maintain my lawn.

So how much help can I really offer the Habitat people? Hopefully they have some very menial tasks, because my family has a tradition with nail gun accidents. That's all I'm saying.

2. Phoenix Environmental Care's "Head of the Grass" quiz (Thursday, Feb. 5th, 3 p.m. at booth 4855). Somehow, I was the one who get shoved into the "Head of the Grass" turf quiz to compete with my fellow turf journalists. Yeah, I'm representing GCM. And since we're the No. 1 turf mag in the business, we should be the favorites to win, right?

We'll see who the other magazines bring. I bet there's a ringer snuck in there, someone with a Ph.D in their back pocket. Hollister told me he trusted me in this role, "You're the one who takes turfgrass classes every year," he said confidently. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I'm usually cross-eyed with confusion by the mid-morning break in most of the turfgrass classes I've taken so far. We'll see. Wish me luck.

3. BASF Turf Media Jeopardy! (Friday, Feb. 6th, 2 p.m., booth 4726).And somehow I'm also the one who gets stuck in BASF's Turf Media Jeopardy! event. How did this happen?

The good news is that the folks at BASF have told me that there will also be pop culture questions in this event, and I'll take the Pepsi challenge with any turf mag nerd in pop culture.

So, there you have it -- three things that could go horribly, horribly wrong for me at the GIS. Notice I've listed day and times for these events? That means I'm inviting you to come by and observe at either of these game show events, and if you want to whisper to me, "That's Fusarium Patch!" when it's my turn, well, hey... I can't help it if GCM's readers love their magazine so much that they want to help a brother out!

Comments

[Neuty]

Ha! I've been shot with nail guns several times. After the first one, they all just run together. And typically HfH doesn't employ pneumatic equipment for just that reason.

You forgot #4 on your list though: losing the ESPN Zone rematch to me, Double-Bogey. I've been practicing pop-a-shot for months...